emo-ness

hide.

2009-10-31T01:13:00.000-07:00

This feeling is all I can feel
There so much I know it has to be real
I can hear them laughing when I turn my back
I know it's me their laughing at
So many laugh and it's plain to see
They're not at fault, there's something wrong with me

This anger won't quit
It's for their kind and I know it
They've ruined my life, and one day they'll have to pay
Till then I must lie in wait
While they laugh and tease and alienate
They are not aware of the hate they create

I can feel it growing it inside my heart
And I know that hate sets me apart
Some say bullies are misunderstood
And that deep down people are 'good'
But I know it's a lie I know it's not true
and I know that childlike innocence dies when everyone laughs at you

I was just six when it all started
I was just a child when my heart parted
Into the sweet little girl that loved and obeyed
And the hurt, angry and screaming victim that bullies create

NESALINEE read this please...

2009-09-24T09:13:00.000-07:00

"hey....wake up......wake up....your already late.......WAKE UP"

someones screaming at me.....

"WAKE UP"

ugh....go away.......

"WAKE UP ALREADY"

my mother?

"QUICKLY!!!!! i've got an exam this morning!"

my sister.....great (sarcasm)......

i drag my body out of bed...limp...limp...limp... i see the bathroom now....huh....i didnt sleep well last night. whatever. to troublesome worrying about it now anyway. i looked at myself in the mirror. i hate the way i look.

i walked back to my room slowly, limping alot. changed into the weird looking government uniform and took all my school things. walked down the stairs.....limp...limp...limp.

entered the car. traffic's bad. fantastic. mum's complaining about the driver's bad driving.....great. just what i need in the morning. " da...dammm.da...." i hate this song. it ticks me off......the melody is awful.....huh...headache..

im at school now. its late. IM late. my sister ran out. i slowly get out of the car. whats the point of running we're already late. i enter the school and get to class.
im late for 1st period. great. it was raining outside...its cold. my hands are frozen from walking up here...

---^---^---^---^---^---^^^^^----^^^^^^----^^^^^^^----^

IT HURTS.....my heart hurts....

STOP

okay im fine now.

^^^^^^^

my hand hurts.

"whats wrong?"

"nothing"

"you sure? you look pale today. you okay?"

"i told you, im fine"

". . ."

"my hand just hurts a little thats all"

"oh... *smile*. im glad then"

"YOU....your evil"

she laughs at me. her hair, her smile, her. she has it all yet she doesnt believe me when i tell her. humble. thats also another good characteristic. when she smiles her true smile (which normally comes with laughter) her face has a calm yet passionate shape. her eyes hinge up to make a gentle smile. her smile, a big grin. her eyelashes brush her cheeks. her hair, in 3 different locks. i can remember all this because.......well its because shes special....

but....

shes in pain. she tells me shes dying everyday. doesnt she realize im already dead? does she realize im a curved mirror reflecting her? reflecting the opposite. or does she think im a reflection of her? a painting. unable to move or act. i wish....i wish....i WOULD... i would help her.but.... i cant even help myself. shes dying but im already dead.

does she realize, two graves have already been dug?

to those of you who dont understand the story (which i guarantee will be ALOT) this is, in short, what im trying to say. nesa, you are my best friend. you are the best best friend ever born. im sorry if i made you sad or anything. i promise, that no matter what happens, ill try, to finish all our troubles together. we are in this life together. i got your back, buddy!

ALSO,I AND/OR NESALINEE ARE NOT LESBIAN IN ANYWAY. WE ARE ONLY BEST FRIENDS AND NOTHING ELSE. NO LESBIAN MATERIAL INTENDED. thank you! :)

a bird in a cage

2009-09-18T07:57:00.000-07:00

I'm coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I'm falling asleep
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke
And she's taking a drag
Now they're going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head
But she's touching his—chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go

2009-09-05T03:41:00.000-07:00

im in love with a murder

2009-09-05T03:10:00.000-07:00

realize.
realize how i hate you.
realize how i love you.
realize how much will power it toke me.
to say those 3 words.

im regret saying those 3 words. but you dont know that.
i hurt. you hurt.
but time has passed.
and you have healed.
and i am still broken.

i remain that way for so long.
because time is longer when your in pain.
i said what i didnt mean.
i wrote what i didnt mean.
you saw what i didnt mean.

and you believed.

i cut my tongue.
you wont see the mark or pain.
i hid it.
but i bleeds.
everytime you look at me.
it doesnt hurt.
but now everything i eat is...

tasteless....

i said those 3 words when what i meant to say is...
i love you.

im sorry.

i dont hate you at all.
i hate myself.
for loving you.
but ill heal.
when you go to hell.

*this is NOT copyrighted.*

black eyed peas

2009-09-03T10:40:00.000-07:00

obsessed

2009-09-03T09:48:00.000-07:00

im not perasan i just like this song so im gonna post this for fun. but its not emo.
*sob*

I was like, "Why are you so obsessed with me?"
So oh oh oh oh
So oh oh oh oh
So oh oh oh oh
So oh oh oh oh
Will the real MC please, step to the mike?

So oh oh oh oh
So oh oh oh oh
So oh oh oh oh
So oh oh oh oh
All up in the blogs
Saying we met at the bar
When I don't even know who you are
Saying we up in your house
Saying I'm up in your car
But you in LA and I'm out at Jermaine's.
I'm up in the A
You so so lame
and no one here even mentions your name
It must be the weed. It must be the E
Cause you be popping hood
You get it popping, Oh

Why you so obsessed with me (Boy I wanna know)
Lying that you're sexing me (when everybody knows)
It's clear that you're upset with me
Finally found a girl that you couldn't impress
Last man on the earth still couldn't hit this
You're delusional, you're delusional
Boy you're losing your mind
It's confusing yo, you're confused you know
Why you wasting your time
Got you all fired up with your Napoleon complex
Seeing right through you like you're bathing in Windex
Boy why you so obsessed with me?

MIA!

2009-08-31T02:00:00.000-07:00

LOL LOL LOL! mia! mia! mia! PLEASE go to this web site! LOL!
http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/424325

it is SUPER FUNNEH! PLEASE GO CHECK IT OUT!

mia, nesa, fazlul (READ THIS)

2009-08-30T03:49:00.000-07:00

huh....tomoroe i will have to drag myself out of bed (again) and dress up in the world's most hideous uniform ever (again) and fight with the rush of everyday life and pretend to be happy and energetic.....

that is until i see them....then i can become myself (again) lazy, tired and sloopy but never the less still smiling. this time with real happy-ness you can see the truth in my eyes. all sorrow breaks lose cause i see them...my best friends.

i will run to them as SLOW as possible to get a top view of my life savers. then (i bet) nesa will smile with ever lasting happy-ness and suddently the room seems brighter, fazlul will smile her usual side smile and scream because of the stress of the up coming projek...and my favourite for last...mia will set the laughter on with her humor (mostly swearing) and i bet i WILL laugh. suddently, everything just seems better.
thank you, mia, nesa and fazlul. I LOVE YOU (as friends) sorry i meant (as BEST FRIENDS)

for you

2009-08-30T03:29:00.000-07:00

I HATE WHAT YOU HAVE DONE TO ME
THE PAIN YOU MADE ME FEEL
WHY CAN'T YOU JUST SIMPLY SEE?
THAT ALL OF THIS IS REAL
BETRAYL, TORMENT I MUST ABIDE
YOUR RULES LIVE THROUGHOUT MY VEINS
THESE LAWS WILL END ONCE YOU HAVE DIED
AND I WILL BE RID OF ALL THIS PAIN
I CAN'T BELIVE I USED TO LOVE YOU
THAT AT ONE POINT I ACTUALLY CARED
NOW ALL THESE EMOTIONS AND GONE AND FLEW
TO THE PLACE THAT WE HAVE DARED
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?
YOU RAN AWAY WITH MY PRIDE
WHY CAN'T WE JUST AGREE?
FOR NOW MY SOUL HAS DIED
I'LL COME BACK
MY PRIDE WILL JOIN ME TOO
I MUST MAKE MY FINAL ATTACK
THE ONE WITHOUT PRIDE IS YOU
HAVE YOU NO SHAME FOR WHAT YOU'VE DONE?
THESE WOUNDS WILL NEVER HEAL
DID YOU THINK IT WAS ALL FOR FUN?
WITH HATE THESE WOUNDS WILL SEAL
LOOK AT ME
MAKE SURE THIS IS FOR REAL
FOR ONCE I'M GONE YOU SEE...
YOU FATE WILL BE SEALED
YOU RIPPED OUT MY HEART
YOU JACKED MY PRIDE
A MIRACULOUS FORM OF YOUR DEADLY ART
THESE DEEDS YOU'VE DONE WILL ALL COLLIDE
AND FROM THIS MOMENT ON
YOU WILL BE DRASTICALLY FACED
WITH THE FACT THAT I'M GONE?
OR SIMPLY MISPLACED
BUT THERE IS ONE THING I KNOW
ONE THING THAT IS CERTAIN
THAT THIS IS MY SHOW
FOR YOU I'VE CLOSED THE CURTAIN
YOU HAVE NOTHING LEFT
FOR I WILL AVENGE MYSELF
THE POUNDING SILENCE WILL BRING YOU DEFT
YOUR WEAKNESSES I WILL FIND WITH STEALTH
THEN START LAUGHING AT YOU
WHILE YOU BURN IN HELL
ARE THESE WORDS, ARE THEY TRUE?
OR SIMPLY THE WORDS OF A GIRL WHO HAS FELL
THESE STATEMENTS OF HATE
FLY LIKE A DOVE
PERHAPS ITS TOO LATE?
TO SAY YOUR THE ONE I LOVE

link~!

2009-08-26T06:52:00.001-07:00

hey there, this is accually a message to my besties, mia, fazlul and nesa!
i was just cheacking out deviantart when i found some really cool flashs and these 3 flashs remind me of you guys! please check them out! I MISS YOU GUYS! ♥

mia;
http://artbit.deviantart.com/art/A-Short-Story-About-Love-40090777

its an emo story, i thought you might like it. its the emo-est!

nesa;
http://nch85.deviantart.com/art/4-friends-and-a-fly-7141619

its a story about a fly! its really really funny! WATCH IT!

fazlul;
http://arechan.deviantart.com/art/waffle-51254862

the begining is kinda boring but the ending is hilarious! check it out! i bet you'll love it...the name of it is waffle

my twbute to my very best friends! ♥

2009-08-26T05:53:00.000-07:00

this is a tribute to my most funniest bestie in the world who ALWAYS manages to make me laugh;
mia ♥

this is also for mia. I COULDNT RESIST! ♥ ♥ ♥

this is for my almost TOO honest bestie and the person who sits next to me in class;
nesalinee ♥

to my very truthful friend who has always manage to ejek me and still look good;
fazlul ♥

WARNING: you people who are NOT mia, nesa or fazlul may NOT understand why i put up these special pictures. so....go figure. also, TO mia fazlul and nesa, please dont take the placing of you names seriously cos i love you all the same (not lesbian)! I MISS YOU! ♥

whats inside

2009-08-23T05:24:00.000-07:00

something so bold....

is so weak...

*emo*

skats

2009-08-23T05:07:00.000-07:00

i guess mia is right, cats are KINDA cute.

2009-08-21T08:59:00.000-07:00

I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave
Your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

food! UM!

2009-08-21T07:08:00.001-07:00

window from hope....

2009-08-20T08:55:00.000-07:00

why cant you see me?

the perfect stranger

2009-08-18T01:28:00.000-07:00

Turn Around
Turn Around and fix your eye in my direction
So there is a connection
I can't speak
I can't make a sound to somehow capture your attention
I'm staring at perfection
Take a look at me so you can see
How beautiful you are

You call me a stranger
You say I'm a danger
But all these thoughts are leaving you tonight
I'm broke and abandoned
You are an angel
Making all my dreams come true tonight

I'm confident
But I can't pretend I wasn't terrified to meet you
I knew you could see right through me
I saw my life flash right before my very eyes
And I knew just what we'd turn into
I was hopeing that you could see
Take a look at me so you can see

TO: my best friend, nesa, you are my perfect stranger.

goldfish

2009-08-17T09:13:00.000-07:00

something that seems so beautiful could be so fragile...

weird

2009-08-15T03:55:00.001-07:00

family get together

2009-08-15T03:47:00.000-07:00

SO CUTE!

tea.

2009-08-15T03:09:00.000-07:00

my sis, my mum and me with tea. YUM!

LEAVE ME ALONE, STALKER!

2009-08-14T01:59:00.000-07:00

okay people, i want to get some things straight. some crazy *bad words* just hacked my account and post some shitty *more bad words* post that is NOT TRUE! (i deleted it already)i dont eff-ing care what that moron thinks and yeah i know who he is and NO i dont like him. in fact I REALY DISLIKE HIM!(diorene says its a sin to say hate towards a person so i shall use the word "dislike" instead cos diorene told me its better)he keeps stalking me with all his stupid phone calls and text messages! LEAVE ME ALONE YOU STALKER! and yeah im very 100% sure who the person is. CANT YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! STOP POSTING EFF-ING STUFF ON MY BLOG! GO GET YOUR OWN BLOG! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DESPISE YOU! mia, nesa and fazlul please online tonight i have to talk to chu about this problem. please, online. im missin you guys already!

the natural love story

2009-08-03T06:35:00.000-07:00

today, as the gentle breeze raced through my garden and into the living room till the first chair among others at the dining table.the chair i would always sit on. my chair. i watched from the sliding door as the breeze ran though the leaves of a particular tree outside. it was so calming. calming enough to touch my soul. the leaves rattled around themselves making a soft calming twine between souls as the breeze cut though them. i smiled weekly at the sight of it. suddenly, almost immediately, it stopped. all the leaves, the stem and my soul stopped... without warning...it didn't move after that. not at all...it almost seem like the breeze cut right through it leaving it dead on the ground. it looked lifeless and almost dead. i felt a jolt of sadness run through me. it reminded me of an impossible thinking we humans call, love... you fall so in love then...without warning it stops. you would either be the breeze or the leaves. i obviously was the leaves. left dead, alone without anyone. sad. alone. cold. while i die slowly here, in pain, you move on without noticing my pain. without caring...like the breeze.i signed....though sadness filled me at that moment my charcoal eyes stay dry. not bleeding with tear drops for i act strong.i sign again. "are you listening?" a honey voice calls out. "huh...ah..yes..." i answer in sober. "good. so....." my mother's honey voice continued. i tried to concentrate but i was constantly being distracted by the thought of you...i sign once more. i look down in sadness...suddenly, from the edge of my ear i could hear a soft rattle. i faced upwards. and there it was....joy overwhelmed me. the leaves of the tree were rattling once more. this time without help. without the breeze....

do you get it? do you understand? *comment* rate* etc.*

twilite is a GREAT BOOK!

2009-08-03T02:29:00.000-07:00

this is suppose to be edward cullen from twilight (applause) but i think he looks more like sasori from naruto shippuden either way, THEY ARE SUPER CUTE, dont cha think?

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE is hot like WOW

2009-08-03T02:06:00.001-07:00

The way you walked in
I saw you standing there
You caught me staring at you
Hot Like Wow

You came a little closer
You know you make me blush
You got a body that is
Hot Like Wow

And all my friends they tell me
You know they think I'm crazy
The things you've got me doing
Hot Like Wow

They say they don't believe me
But I know they're just jealous
The freaky things you do are
Hot Like Wow

HOT LIKE WOW! (stroll down READ everything and you'll know why i put this!) taggy waggy

2009-08-02T11:22:00.000-07:00

okay so heres, the taggies;
RULES:
1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, mp3 player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Tag 15 friends
5. Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.
6. Have Fun!

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
you're a god? (LOL-ing!! i love this song!!!)

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
behind blue eyes (emo...)

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
pictures of you (SOBBING)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
UP! THE SATURDAYS! YEAH!

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Sexyback, naruto version? LOL LOL LOL!

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
addicted? WEIRD!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
thunder? LOL! true!

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
bringin sasuke back? o.O this is freakin me out!

WHAT IS 2+2?
colours? YAY! *dances*

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
nesalinee is....IN THE SHADOWS?! i didnt know nesalinee was emo?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
obvious.....*blush*

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
how to save a life? WOW! how perfect.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
in the shadows, shikamaru version. (GREAT now im a emo bum. wait...I AM A EMO BUM!)

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
SOS! this wan also fits perfectly!

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Gangsta! LOL LOL LOL LOL!!!!!!

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
soul eater theme song smash version???? doesnt make sense!

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
taking back my love? okaaaay?

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/Interest?
maneater...LOL! so not true!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
danjo?????? LOL LOL! i CANNOT imagine mia, fazlul and nesa dancing to danjo!!!!

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
phenomenon

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
teenage dirtbag....OKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY??

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Apologize. fits!

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
stuck! great song!

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
get another boyfriend. 0.o MAY BE I WILL!! if i had one....well...DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO!

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
love, sex and magic? OMG! THAT IS GROSSS!!!!!!!!!

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
mauve-ino no sympathy

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
battlefield. my life IS a battlefield!

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
untouched. DONT TOUCH ME!

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
boys, boys, boys. true. LOL! JK

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Hot like WOW! may be i will post this as it!

okay i tag....
1. nesalinee! (no DUH!)
2. fazlul (hello =D)
3. mia (twilight! i bought the book. i hope you dont think im copying you. please dont think that. and btw, I LOVE IT! so on monday, if i ignor all you guys and focus on my book, dont blame me!THE BOOK SPREE IS ON!!!! ps; I MISSIN YOU! and edward must be hot or somthing cos bella is SO attached to him! GOD! using beautiful for a guy is kinda...weird. let me know when your onlining, count me in, kay? thanks!!!)
4. huff...that was A LONG ONE! anyway, i pick....CHERMAINE TAN!
5. i would pick charmaine hee too but she already done it so i pick...JACK!!! have fun doing it and i hope your feeling better!
6. ADRIAN! DOUBLE DUH!
7. diorene (even if she doesnt do it i want her to know how important she is to me! *smiles*)
8. TWILITE~random!
9. john WEEEEE!!! later im going to play my Wiiiiiiiii!!! accually i really wanted to play me Wii! *sob*
10. DANA CHAN! sorry your at last. i overloaded on names! KOMENDASAI!
11. i...
12. dunno...
13. who...
14. else...
15. this is the end....

well, thats all....BYies!

5 facts of an emo person (by my opinion)

2009-08-02T10:47:00.000-07:00

okay so by my opinion, as a fellow emo member, i shall tell you 5 facts about emo people (im bored!)

WARNING: the contents may NOT be true!

okay so fact number 1!
in fact, emo people LIKE to be touched (as in hug and cuddling, NOTHING DIRTY). they are sometimes so left out that they just need a warm hug and a pat on the back and stuff like that. so go and hug an emo NOW!!!

fact number TOO!
most emo people try to hide their crying. they dont want other people to know so they find a certain place or corner or they just dig a hole and sob, cry , kill themselves or....they just BE EMO. it will normally be their room or a corner OF THE ROOM.

which brings us to fact number 3!
emo people like to hurt themselves and they also like to show their pain (as in cuts and bruises etc.) to others. it makes helps them express themselves to the world and by doing this they also hope that YOU understand what they feel inside.

@$#*~ means number 4!!!
emo people like BLACK and RED. RED simbolises (dont know how to spell! LOL! XD) blood (as said in fact number 3, they like to express themselves and this is a less painfull way of expressing to other people, mainly for the cowardly ones (like me))and black is for....well lets face it black is officially an emo colour!

and lastly, fact number 5!!!!!!
okay so this is kinda like a warning. emo people normally like to take people down with them. this means that when they are emo they have the force of habit to make you emo too. also, if you find an emo letter DONT READ IT unless its for you, then READ IT! cos normally emo letters are all death notes (i used to write death notes when i was young, SERIOSLY!) and they will make YOU jump off a clift!

so thats basic-ly all the emo facts you ought to know. i have more but....i dont want to make you sad. so i hope you dont spam me. and please let me know your opinions by leaving me a comment! i would love to knoe what you think of being a true emo and if your not emo, just leave a comment for the fun of it.

My boyfriend

2009-07-31T07:53:00.001-07:00

Inside of my bedroom, all covered in blood, I shot my poor boyfriend with a 44 stud.
I went to his funeral, I went to his grave. Some people threw flowers, so I threw a grenade.
He got up and chased me; I thought he was dead, so you know what I did?
I took my bazooka and blew off his head.

THIS IS FOR NESA, MIA, FAZLUL AND ALL MY OTHER BESTIES!!!

2009-07-31T07:18:00.000-07:00

Red roses are so cliché—and a yellow rose did not say enough

A white rose speaks of purity—perhaps I should have reached for the blue.

Though mysterious, that colored rose just did not seem to suit you.

I could have reached for the pink, but I held back.

Though your presense gives me happiness—the pink just seemed to lack.

I needed something more—something that spoke of us

That said “forever is our friendship” and you’re the one I’ll forever trust.

And that is when it dawned on me—the colored rose I’ll give

The color of all eternity. The one that forever lives.

You might think this is crazy—like logic never once touched my mind

Perhaps you’re right, but this is the only way to state our friendship is eternal

And that even in the darkest light—you’ll always shine.

So I present to you a black rose—yes, go ahead and gasp in fright

But let me explain this to you and perhaps you’ll see my logic may be right.

A black rose is symbolized as death—thanks to Hollywood these days

But isn’t death the only thing that is eternal? Forever you live in memories

And this is my way of saying—that even in the after life

You’ll always be a best friend to me.

Nothing in life nor in death could ever change that.

can you see the message im sending?

2009-07-31T02:30:00.000-07:00

This is the clock upon the wall
This is the story of us all
This is the first sound of a newborn child,
Before he starts to crawl
This is the war that’s never won
This is a soldier and his gun
This is the mother waiting by the phone,
Praying for her son

Pictures of you, pictures of me
Hung upon your wall for the world to see
Pictures of you, pictures of me
Remind us all of what we used to be

There is a drug that cures it all
Blocked by the governmental wall
We are the scientists inside the lab,
Just waiting for the call
This earthquake weather has got me shaking inside
I'm high up and dry

Pictures of you, pictures of me
Hung upon your wall for the world to see
Pictures of you, pictures of me
Remind us all of what we used to be

Confess to me, every secret moment
Every stolen promise you believed
Confess to me, all that lies between us
All that lies between you and me

We are the boxers in the ring
We are the bells that never sing
There is a title we can't win no matter
How hard we might swing

Pictures of you, pictures of me
Hung upon your wall for the world to see
Pictures of you, pictures of me
Remind us all of what we used to be

Pictures of you, pictures of me
Hung upon your wall for the world to see
Pictures of you, pictures of me
Remind us all of what we could have been.....

*there is a code, if you really care then you will be able to find it*

2009-07-31T02:11:00.000-07:00

pictures of me....

pictures of you...

hanging on the wall so the world can see...

*dedicated to my best friend nesalinee and her man*

picture love story...

2009-07-30T07:57:00.000-07:00

my picture love story.sometimes words cannot express how i feel.

i love you so much. oh how i wished you would feel the same...so even if it hurts so much. i hold it in. so deep in that nobody can reach it but you.

i've been holding it in for ever. your love hurts. im just acting like a tough girl by keeping a straight face and i keep lying to myself. again and again.

i feel like breaking down on my knees and begging. begging for you to love me. begging for something that will never come. begging for a lie.

But no matter what i cant lie. not to that face. not to those innocent eyes that lie deep into my soul without even blinking. into that angel face that hides lies from beneath the grave and below. i cant lie for i am cursed. with a curse no one can cure. for i am in love with you.

2009-07-30T07:52:00.000-07:00

hinata and neji!!!! PUNK! YOU ROCK, NEJI!!!!!! XD

if you hate me then why pretend love?

2009-07-30T07:34:00.000-07:00

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before?
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you's impossible to find
You're impossible to find

2009-07-30T07:27:00.000-07:00

cupcake

2009-07-27T08:09:00.001-07:00

emo people love too...

2009-07-27T08:04:00.000-07:00

mirror...

behind the mask...

2009-07-27T08:02:00.000-07:00

We masquerade around this floor
But no one seems to see what we are,
These masks they hide it all forgetting who we were

So dear just drop the act tonight I'll lose my mask if you'll lose yours, let us see what we could be for the very first time

Oh my lady may I have this dance tonight
Oh my lady may I have your hand tonight
We beat our shadows into the floor I'm all in tonight I'm all in
You beat your heart into mine I'm all yours tonight I'm all yours

So dear just drop the act tonight
I'll lose my mask if you lose yours,
Just drop your heart to the floor and make this last

May I have this dance just take me for what it's worth
Because this is all I have
May I have your hand just take mine for what I'm worth
Because you are all I am

K-ON!

2009-07-24T07:31:00.000-07:00

CHEAT

2009-07-17T00:57:00.000-07:00

you have always been CHEATING on me, havent you?

BFF means forever...

2009-07-17T00:55:00.001-07:00

everyone needs a best friend.
im sooo happy i have one true one.
thank you...

in the shadows...

2009-07-17T00:52:00.000-07:00

No sleep
No sleep until I am done with finding the answer
Won't stop
Won't stop before I find a cure for this cancer
Sometimes
I feel I going down and so disconnected
Somehow
I know that I am haunted to be wanted

I've been watching
I've been waiting
In the shadows all my time
I've been searching
I've been living
For tomorrows all my life

In the shadows

In the shadows

my life is like death....

2009-07-15T10:25:00.000-07:00

I admire, Ah, that howling moon high up in the deep, mauve-colored night
Their souls that I smell in the smashed and scattered debris, So, are shouting

Two destinies live in darkness
When my hand and my arm
resonate with each other, now shake up! shake up!

The soul style of a wavelength that accelerates in macro
To protect you to the end I can become strong
Peace and justice are Death of (the) rule
The red spray is a noble blade
When a bond is born, wishes will be granted; fight out! fight out!

I ruffle my robe in the wind and tonight, I’m dashing again, Ah, I won’t lose
C’mon, let’s go without waiting; when I dance in midair it’s Exciting, So, I feel it

Two destinies that aspire together
If your eyes and your eyes
Could believe in each other, shake up! shake up!

An invincible cool scythe leaps to the mast
Here courage will awaken
The goddess of victory is death or life
A blade where a black rush of blood boils
When a bond is born, it connects to sympathy, fight out! fight out!

Two destinies that share tears
When my hand and my arm
Turn into dreams, now shake up! shake up!

The soul style of a wavelength that accelerates in macro
To protect you to the end I can become strong
Peace and justice are Death of (the) rule
The red spray is a noble blade
When a bond is born, wishes will be granted; fight out! fight out!

destiny is what it is....

a meaning...

2009-07-15T10:01:00.000-07:00

Should you expect to see something that you hadn't seen
In somebody you'd known since you were sixteen;
if love is a bolt from the blue, then what is that bolt but a glorified screw?
and that doesn't hold nothing together
Far from these nonsense bars and their nowhere music it's making me sick
And I know it's making you sick
There's nothing there, it's like eating air
It's like drinking gin with nothing else in
That doesn't hold me together.

But for one crowded hour, you were the only one in the room
And I sailed around all those bumps in the night to your beacon in the gloom
I thought I had found my golden September in the middle of that purple June
But one crowded hour would lead to my wreck and ruin

Now I know you like your boys to take their medicine
From the bowl with a silver spoon
Run away with the dish and scare the fish by the silvery light of the moon
Who were taught from the womb to believe to the tune
In as far as their bleeding eyes see
Is a pleasure pen, meant for them, built for and rent for them
Not for the likes of me
Not for the like of you and me

And for one crowded hour, you were the only one in the room
And I sailed around all those bumps in the night to your beacon in the gloom
I thought I had found my golden September in the middle of that purple June
But one crowded hour would lead to my wreck and ruin

Oh but the green-eyed harpy of the songland
She takes into hers my hand
She says, "Boy I know you're lying
Oh but then, so am I,"
And to that I said "Oh well."

They put me in a cage full of lions, I learned to speak lion
In fact I know the language well
I picked it up while I was versing myself in the languages they speak in hell
That night, the silence gave birth to a baby
They took it away to her silent dismay
And they raised it to be lady
Now she can't keep her mouth shut

But for one crowded hour, you were the only one in the room
And I sailed around all those bumps in the night to your beacon in the gloom
I thought I had found my golden September in the middle of that purple June
But one crowded hour would lead to my wreck and ruin

One crowded hour, you were the only one in the room
Well I played a few songs for those bumps in the night
In fact I played this very tune
You said, "What is this six-stringed instrument but an adolescent doom?"
And one crowded hour would lead to my wreck and ruin.

and now your probally wondering what this song means....
well, think. doesnt this remind you of something....
does it?
think.
think really hard.

one hour can change everything...

TAGGIES!

2009-07-11T10:02:00.000-07:00
okay so here it is:
001. Real Name: Chan Sook Cheng
002. Nickname(s):........dont ask
004. Horoscope: Sagittarius
005. Gender: its a girl!
006. Elementary: .....forgot! LOL! im such a retard!
007. Primary School: SKSBU
008. Secondary School: SMK SBU
009. College: dunno...
010. Hair Color: black-ish brown thats goin to die
011. Hair Length: short but long enough to tie
012. Loud or Quiet: depends on who im talking to
013. Sweats or Jeans: Jeans
014. Phone or Camera: Phone
015. Health Freak: ...maybe
016. Drink or Smoke: go figure
017. Do you have a crush on someone: .....maybe
018. Eat or Drink: BOTH! SH'YEAH!
019. Piercings: none
020. Tattoos: none. DONT STAIN THE BODY GOD GAVE YOU!
021. Social or Anti-Social: SOCIAL!
022. Righty or lefty: Righty
023. First piercing: never
024. First relationship: 17 january 2009
025. First Best Friend: i think its aina
026. First Award: i receive all 3 awards at the same time at elementery school so i dunno
027. First Kiss: i aint tellin
028. First Pet: fish
029. First Big Vacation: AUSTRALIA!
030. First Love at first sight: got! but not gonna tell!
031. First Big Birthday: all my birthdays suck
032. First Surgery: AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
033. First sport you joined: i think its ping pong. i joined it so i dont have to tukar baju! LOL!
034. Orange or Apple juice: I TTLY LOVE BOTH!
035. Rock or Rap: BOTH!
036. Country or Screamo: country!
037. NSYNC or Backstreet boys: what the?
038. Britney spears or Christina Aguilera: Britney Spears!!!!
039. Night or Day: BOTH!
040. Sun or Moon: moon. i cant see the sun!
041. TV or Internet: a little of both!
042. Playstation or XboX: playstation!
043. Kiss or hug: BOTH!
044. Iguana or turtle: ahhh......i cant hurt a turtle (its against my grandfather's tradition LOOONG STORY) and iguanas are WEIRD so....none? can i pick that?
045. Spider or bee: what the...
046. Fall or spring: FALL! its windy during fall!
047. Limewire or iTunes: getting lazy!
048. Soccer or baseball: soccer. i got my right eye hurt thanks to baseball!
049. Eating: EVERYTHING IN ITS WAY!
050. Drinking: what i can drink i drink.

i will turn crazy if i accually did all 100. i am TOOO lazy! anyway im tagging 10 ppl and the "lucky" people are....
1. nesalinee (rmb the deal, kay?)
2. fazlul (ask nesa about the deal before doing this tag, kay?)
3. adrian (halo)
4. jack (dont be emo bout cha bunny kay?)
5. charmiane hee (*smiles*)
6. diorene (KKS! ORAL! ITS KILLING ME!!!!)
7. alex (the lion! RAWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
8. my sista!
9. cheah (YAY)
10. johnathan? (or jenny as i prefer)

2009-07-11T03:48:00.000-07:00

hahas^^

to all haters...

2009-07-09T08:18:00.000-07:00
TO ALL HATERS!
THIS IS A SHOUT OUT FOR YOU!
(foul language will be present in this content/post. viewer discretion is advised.)

you know exactly who you are,
i keep it all real and thats a promise,
i may be a b*tch but at least im honest,
when you see me around you stop and you stare,
keep your eye on me all you want cos i aint scared,
i have my own life to be concerned about,
i dont have time to worry about yours,
im not trying to please you or make you smile,
grow up and live your own damn life,
and stop worrying so much about mine,
just shut your hatin ass up!
and keep my name out of you mouth,
shit the haters, fakers and the wannabe friends,
thanks for making me the center of your world,
ASS-ES!

*i have changed a few words to make this more apporiate for you. but haters, I MEANT EVERYWORD I WROTE!*

this post is for;
- nesalinee (just bcos 2 idiots dont like you doesnt mean anything. I LIKE YOU! and YOUR A GREAT FRIEND so its THEIR loss! THEY are IDIOTS)
- alex (good luck with haters)
- adrian (hope your womanizer thingy doesnt go out of hand)
- vannessa (i dont know you that well but i heard you have a lot of haters. its okay. WHO CARES ABOUT THEM ANYWAY!)
- myself (i hate myself but i ran out of things to say so....)

....who have suffered from the hater disease.
GOD BLESS THEM!

behind blue eyes....

2009-07-09T08:13:00.000-07:00

no one knows what its like,
to be the bad man,
to be the sad man,
behind blue eyes,
and no one knows what its like to be hated,
to be fated,
to telling only lies....

so wrong...

2009-07-09T08:06:00.000-07:00
people lie and people cheat,
people hate and people hurt,
but i thought you were something special,
something different,
something new,
something to help me...,
but...,
you are the same,
you lie and you cheat,
you hate and you hurt,
me....

leave out the anime in the word "to anime haters"

2009-07-08T08:51:00.000-07:00
OMG! LOL!

dont be sad...

2009-07-07T09:57:00.000-07:00

dear jack,
this is for YOU! i just wanted to say... im so sorry for the death of your truly beloved bunny....i share your sadness as a few days ago my bunny....also...passed on...*sob* i miss the little guy....and i just wanted to say that i hope you get better. and if this is you (adrian) please pass this message to jack. thank you! and im sorry if this reminds you of you bunny... he is in a better place now so pwease dont be emo like i always am...for i and adrian are here...

love you hate me,
chan sook cheng

my god be with you and your family.

I HATE HATERS! AND LEAVE MY BEST FRIENDS ALONE!

2009-07-07T09:16:00.000-07:00

okay so there are ALOT of ppl bugging me and my best frens so i decided to do this. also, im bored. so anyway here it is;

STOP BUGGING US!

mia and eliza.

who ever it is, STOP BUGGING MIA! JUST STOP IT! you wrote on mia's cbox....or was it eliza's cbox....either one of their cboxes, anyway, you wrote "i support you,chan" or something like that. and if you support me then there is two things i have to say. firstly, if you support me then i am advising you to STOP bothering mia and leave eliza alone too, okay? if you really support me then pwease LEAVE MIA AND ELIZA ALONE! okay i think thats it for reason number 1. secondly,.....umm......well...thank you for supporting me? sorry but i didnt think 1 reason would be nice so i said 2 but accually i only got one reason....who cares. LOL! im such a retard!

nesalinee

to SOME ppl out there with half a brain! THIS MESSAGE IS FOR YOU! and nesa... anyway,
to two, three or four SILLY PPL (i dont wanna use foul language) WHY ARE YOU PICKING ON NESA! i knoe you guys hate me okay? and i accept the fact that you ppl will never change and dont misunderstand me okay? i dont hate you cos diorene told me its a sin so i DONT hate you but i DONT like you either and you are NOT okay either so i DISLIKE you. okay? and so does nesa! anyway i get it i am a very evil person (i also dont wanna use foul language for this one) and you guys hate me! I GET IT! I GOT OVER IT! SO GET A LIFE! but the thing i dont understand why you have to hate nesa too? HUH? WHY? hating ppl for no reason! ITS A SIN! and nesa is a VERY nice person! so its a loss for you, NOT HER! GET A LIFE IDIOTS!

alex
okay. so some of you guys may not like him for some particular reason. i knoe some of you guys. but im not gonna tel. anyway, why do you guys hate him anyway? hes a really nice person! hes my best friend! and he is really nice when you get through all the silly things he does that make me and nesa laugh. and if you were an understanding person then you would get it but if your not then KEEP ALL THE BAD THINGS IN YOUR HEAD AND GET A LIFE! but dont feel sad alex, you have nesa, me and fazlul plus all your other guy frens. your not alone. RIGHT NESA?

myself

so, you hate me, its okay. i hate myself too. and i am ugly and fat. you dont have to tell me twice. and i am stupid and not artistic or good in sports or have any musical talent. and im really rude and ppl all hate me. but thats me NOT YOU. and akwardly, i can live with the downs of me so WHY CANT YOU? seriously! dont tell me that you dont have a life till you have to ruin other ppls lifes just to have a little excitement in your life. JEEZ! and do you think that if you dont wanna be frens with me that i give a tiny rat's ass about it? if you dont fren me then fine! do you honestly think that by not being my fren that you can bring down my whole purpose of living or some thing? I GOT MY OWN FRIENDS! TRUE FRIENDS NOT LIKE YOU! so ASS OFF!

lastly, i just wanna say,

I HATE SPAMMERS! TO THOSE WHO I MENTIONED ABOVE (HATERS) GET A LIFE OR GO DIE!
thank you for bothering to read this post! may god be with you!

haiya

2009-07-05T05:20:00.000-07:00

haizz, kks vry hrd. i wnder hw 2 do it. btw, i mis my specific person. ^^hahas

your voice is music

2009-07-04T07:24:00.000-07:00
please call me...
i need to hear your voice...

2009-07-04T07:20:00.000-07:00

just turn around...

2009-07-04T07:15:00.000-07:00
a smile is a thousand words.

2009-07-04T00:38:00.000-07:00
i hate everything about you,
why do i love you?

2009-07-04T00:36:00.000-07:00
you dont understand me,
i dont think you'll ever understand me

2009-07-04T00:16:00.000-07:00

bunnies are nice...

what if...

2009-07-03T08:47:00.000-07:00

If I hugged you,

would you never let go?

If I kissed you,

would you cherish that moment?

If I reached for your hand,

would you take mine gently?

If I needed a shoulder,

would you let me cry on yours?

If I needed to talk,

would you really listen?

If I needed to scream,

would you do it with me?

If I needed to go,

would you come with me?

If I fell for you,

would you catch me?

or just let me hit the pavement?

the camellia flower...

2009-07-03T08:10:00.001-07:00

i am a scentless flower.....

when your not paying attention....

i slowly blossom...

and quietly whither in a miserable way

.....without notice......

i die.......

alone

just turn around..

2009-07-03T08:07:00.000-07:00

no matter where i am,

when i turn around,

i see you,

i smile,

you smile back,

thank you for being here when i need you,

even if you arent really here...

2009-07-03T08:01:00.000-07:00
Maybe, I wanna be your girl
Maybe, all I need is you
Anna ni mou soba ni ite mo
Konna ni mou ai sarete mo
Jikan wa mikata shite kurezu ni
Anata no kanojo ni narenai atashi
Sore de mo ii tte nan do mo omotta
Anata wo dareka to SHEA shite iru keredo
Sore ja iya da tte nan do mo naiteru
Uso de mo kiyasume de mo atashi dake tte itte

i knoe that by now your wondering what that means, well this is what it means;

~Maybe I wanna be your girl~
~Maybe all I need is you~
As much as you are next to me
As much as you give me loving
Without time siding by me
I cannot become your girlfriend
"I'm fine with it," I kept thinking,
you being shared with someone else,but i just kept on crying:
"I don’t like it"
Even if it’s a lie or for comforting,
just say:
"You’re my only one"

IM SO eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeemo!!! SOMEONE JUST GIVE ME A HUG ALREADY!!!

all credits to chieko kawabe

IM GONNA MISS YOU GUYS! (girls and guys accually)

2009-07-03T07:59:00.000-07:00

okay,so yesterday was teachers day.....AND NOW WE GOT 2 WEEKS OFF! huh....accually....i wana go back to school! its very borin at home! and i have to do the bloody moral hw! LAZY! im emo now.....cos of last nite....im sorry to a specific person....i didnt mean to fight with the person i was just EMO.....anyway, yesterday was okay in the morning....ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! IT WAS HORRIBLE!!! all the speechs were a drag. but thankfully, my bestfrens saved me a seat in front. we sat together and made jokes bout the teahers but nothin too serious. and then they asked us to move behind so i made my way behind....behind....WAYYYYY BACKK!!!! then i sat down and i just reliezed...WE WERE AT THE END OF EVERYBODY! cool! so we talked and talked and talked! and then we sang songs and we tok alot of photos! special thanks to who ever brough the camera. and after that we went to eat.....rehat was okay....mia, nesa n fazlul and the others were having a blast eating but i only ate a small sandwich and a mint.....diet....UGH! then after that we went back to put our bags down and we went to go greet out VERY KIND AND TOUGHTFUL TEACHER, PN.YEO!!!! i greeted her and she was SO NICE! and then we went down and again we sat behind but then the probates FORCED us infront so we did...a little...then i sat next to nesa and alex and next to nesa was bryton (he seems to love taking pictures) and i think next to him was daval (sorry for wrong spelling if there is any) and infront of me was mia who was in between eliza and fazlul who was beside fatin who was beside some guy (i forgot his name sorry*sweat*) i felt SOOO SLEEPY!!! and i wanted to sleep on nesa's shoulder but she was ALREADY SLEEPING!!! HOW CAN SHE EVEN SLEEP WHEN THERES A CRAZY GUY BEHIND US SCREAMING?! anyway somehow she managed to ignore the screaming and sleep she slept on her bag, facedown so i couldnt sleep on her so i just sleept and i end up on alex's shoulder...well he didnt mind so, who cares. and besides we ARE best frens so nothing wrong wit that, rite? and so i continued to sleep then out of no where the crazy baboon behind me screamed and i immediately woke up and stood straight! and then i fell asleep again....huh...sleeping was nice....then nesa and me slept, alex was reading his geo exam paper, eliza,mia and fazlul were gossipping, fatin and the guy were talkin bout somthing and the probates were...probating i guess... and then again i slept on his shoulder then again with the baboon behind me and his screams UGH! GOD! and so i woke up! JEEZ! will he ever SHUT UP?and so the day ended fast and eventually nesa woke up! LOL! nobody could handle the screams of that guy! and in the end i said bye to nesa and hugged her and i didnt see the others....huh...i should have hugged them TOO! *sob* and so i walked back home and looked up at the sky and tought bout my day....then i almost tripped! JK! i met up with chan wei yan and we talked talked talked then i talked to ivan for a bit and waited for my mum....and thats my day. boring huh? it was fun for me. and i wanna thank nesa and fazlul for getting gifts for me! THANK YOU! and i feel bad for not getting you guys anyting! I DIDNT KNOE! IM SORRY! and im also sorry to a specific person....EMO

tagged? again?!

2009-07-03T07:51:00.000-07:00
ok so...i got tagged AGAIN. and im not SO lazy today so i think ill do this one. "special" thanks to chermaine tan. JK. JK. Anyway...
Rules and regulation of the tag ;All 21 people must do unless you don't have a blog.Write the names of 16 friends you can think of in your head.And then answer the questions,Say you're guessing if you don't know,But at least guess on all of them.After doing this, tag your 21 "lucky" friends to do the same

1. adrian (internet buddy!)
2. fazlul (SHES THE BEST FREN A GIRL COULD HAVE)
3. diorene tung (she gives good advice)
4. ivan wong (HE gives good advice TOO)
5. nesalinee (the person who sits nex to me in class)
6. charmaine hee (SUPER CUTE)
7. eliza tan ( sms?)
8. fatin nursyazana ( ex-bff but still we're good frens)
9. chan wei yan (YAY)
10. alex (*grrs*NO MORE CHOCOLATE)
11. cheah (hes okay...we dont fight so...)
12. jonathan (*even more grrs*HELL NO! HES EVIL!!!)
13.chermaine tan ( thanks for tagging me i guess)
14.oxXAerithMaddyXxo ( shes the best there is )
15. firdaus (WHERE ARE YOU?!)
16. irvin yeoh (hi?)
17. sook cheng (my clone)
18. saw (we have been frens since we were babies)
19. mun loong (....)
20. jack? ( long time no talk! hey adrian help me tell him pls!)
21. mia1.

How do you meet 7?
- i 4got already but i knoe we met in year 6...huh....good times ,good times...

2. What would you do if you and 15 had never met?
- i think ill be lonely cos normally he sits either in front or beside me in class and I MISS HIM!

3. What would you do if 20 and 1 dated?
- HAHA!!! LOL! i almost dropped out of my chair! NO WAY! they are not gay! or are they.....NAH! they are bffs!

4. Have you seen 17 cried?
- no but she told me she does....aww....

5. Would 4 and 16 make a good couple?
- NO WAY! gay gay gay.

6. Do you think 11 is attractive?
- uhh.....hes nice7.

What is 2's favourite colour?
- ......green? NO WAIT! pink?......yellow?

8. When was the last time you talked to 9?
- well a few hours ago...i met her in school! duh! her locker is right in front of my table!

9. What language does 8 speaks?
- english and only english but she does knoes how to speak malay

10. Who is 13 going out with?
- dunno.....WHO ARE you dating, chermaine tan?

11. Would you ever date 17?
- I AM NOT LESBIAN!!

12. Where do 18 live?
- dunno....we are chilhood frens but i dunno where he stays

13. What is the best thing about 4?
- he gives me good advice

14. What would you like to tell 10 right now?
- *grrs* (JK)

15. What is the best thing about 20?
- hes funny!

16. Have you ever kiss 2?
- HELL NO! IM SOOO NOT LESBIAN!!!

17. What is the best memory you have on 5?
- haha! "the fan at the pole" joke!!! haha!

18. When is the next time you're going to see 4?
- umm...tommorrow i guess?

19. How is 7 different from 6?
- eliza talks more i guess....

20. Is 2 pretty?
- sh'yeah

21. What is your first impression on 15?
- he is SOO quiet!

22. How did you meet 3?
- in year 4. she got 1st in class and i got 2nd and we were the only ones who were moved to 5 bestari and we didnt knoe anybody there so the bond was formed!

23. Is 5 your best friend?
- YEAH! how did you knoe???

24. Do you hate 12?
- kinda! he teased me!

25. Have you seen 18 in the last month?
- uhh....yeah i think so

26. When was the last time you saw 16?
- today. 1st period. MATHS!

27. Have you been to 5's house?
- nope....

28. When's the next time u'll see 10?
- i think in class

29. Are you close to 11?
- kinda. my mum knoes his mum who knoes eugene's mum who knoes lim's mum who knoes lee's mum who knoes lum's mum who knoes...

30. Have you been to the movies with 4?
- nope...

31. Have you gotten trouble with 18?
- never!

32. Would you give 19 a hug?- ..............

33. When have you lied to 3?- once... BUT I HAD TO!

34. Is 11 good at socializing?- yeah! hes friendly!

35. Do you know a secret about 8?
- i knoe all her past year ones and some from this year TOO!

36. Describe the relationship between 12 and 18.
- more gays?

37. What's the best thing about your friendship with 9?
- shes so super nice and we share almost the same name!

38. Have you ever had a crush on 12?
- NEVER IN MY LIFE!

39. How long have you known 2?
- i think 1 year or more...

40. Does 11 have a girlfriend/boyfriend?
- dunno

41. Have you ever wanted to punch 1 on the face?
- never! hes soo nice!

42. Has 21 meet your parents?
- my mum yes. my dad. NO ONE HAS SEEN MY DAD!

43. How did you meet 11?
- 4got already!

44. Did you ever accidentally physically hurt 3?
- well...mybe just a slight push. i slightly push her...THEN SHE HITS ME TILL I HIT THE WALL!

45. Do you live close to 7?
- i have no idea where she lives

46. What is 8's favourite food?
- i think its french fries

47. What kind of car does 1 have?
- i really dunno

48. Have you traveled anywhere with 9?
- nope. i just met her this year49.

If you give 14 a $100, What would he/she spend it on?
- firstly, WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD I GIVE MONEY AWAY?! (JK JK) and since shes older than me maybe she'll get som girl adult thing that she likes. i dunno. maybe a hidan bag or something?

50. What is so great bout 13?
- we have been frens since year 3 and somhow we always have somthing to talk bout. being with her is never boring!

PEOPLE WHO ARE VERY LUCKY TODAY THAT HAS BEEN TAGGED BY ME!!!:
~okay! i tag....
1. MY SISTER (WAKAKAKA!! try doin THIS!)
2. diorene! ( enjoy!)
3. charmaine hee (^^)
4. adrian (when have i NOT tagged you?!)
5. jonathan (WEE!)
6. sin zhao hong (???)
7. ivan ( I-VA-NA!)
8. dana (CHAN)
9. alex (the lion?)
10. mun loong (....)
11. chien loo (if she has a blog)
12. eliza (ill sms you l8r kay?)
13. ong rou jen (thanks for hitting the "follow" button!
14. loo wai kei (st.johns!)
15. cheah (hi?)
16. lee (nigahiga nigahiga nigahiga!)
17. eugene???
18. jack (long time no talk)
19. oxXAerithMaddyXxo! (if she has a blog)
20. arishah (*smiles*)
21. amelia (^^)

phew....im so tired! okay i g2g do the sivik thingy or nesalinee will kill me! LOL! bye! and oh yeah..thanks for reading!

being tag is a drag (JK!)

2009-07-03T07:47:00.000-07:00
ok umm....lets see:

1. What do you think about yourself?
- i hate myself and i think i should kill myself *sob*

2. Why?
- cos my life sucks! and cos im emo now

3. If you could make any character come to life, what would it be?- shikamaru nara (my fav character) so we can be lazy TOGETHER

4. Have you regretted anything you did before?
- yeah.

5. Name two.Make wrong decisions
- sleeping more than studying
- eating so much chips when i was in year 1 (now i gotta diet!)

6. Have you liked someone the opposite sex before?
-umm.....yeah

7. Name five?
- whoa! no way!

8.How are you feeling right now?
- emo, tried (im tried cos its 1.03 IN THE MORNING!) and HUNGRY

9. What will most probably happen tomorrow?
- MOTHER'S DAY!

10. Who do you want to see most RIGHT NOW?
- MY DAD! hes overseas.....(i miss my daddy!!!) and either than that all i wanna see now is the bed and the pillow and hopefully theres a blanket there too!

11. Do you belief in God?
-OF COURSE!! god is almighty! I LOVE HIM! I AM VERY VERY RELIGIOUS!

12. Do you love him?
- YEAH!

13. Have you ever talked sick with your friends?
- maybe....

14. Are people the opposite sex involved in your conversations too?
- maybe.....somtimes...

15. What do you want to achieve now?
- a's in the up comin exam...and oh yeah i also wanna achive the guiness world record for sleeping the longest! ( i think i did that already though XD)

16. Name 6 friends.
a. adrian! ( miss you buddy! )
b. nesalinee ( best bud eva!)
c. fazlul (SHES JUST SO NICE)
d. diorene ( i can always count on her!)
e. charmaine hee ( aww...shes SOO CUTE)
f. erm....does family count? cos if it does...I PICK MY SISTER!

17. Describe 3
- i have already done that. LOOK UP!

18. Who do you love more?1 or 4?
umm....I LOVE BOTH! EQUAL! EQUAL!

19. Use ONE word to describe 5.
cute , cute , CUTE!! and if its two words...CUTE AND NICE

20. If the world is coming to the end, what would you say to 2?
WHAT THE HELL?! if the world was comin to an end i would say SAVE ME!!

Tag: 1.MY SISTER! (HA! have fun che!)
2.adrian of course! (hope you enjoy doin it buddy!)
3.charmaine hee (of course!)
4.diorene ( *smiles*)umm lets see....oh yeah
5. jonathan ( WEE!),
6.ivan (i just relieze that i-va-na sounds like iguana or i wanna, haha!)
7. alex (seriously NO CHOCOLATE)
8.dana CHAN ( also known as kakashi! haha! i love her taste in songs! )
and...wow this tagging list is long! well ok i think thats it! okay then bye!

2009-07-03T07:45:00.000-07:00
okay....so i got tagged?! OMG! im so unpopular so this is weird.....but thanks charmaine I LOVE YOU (as a friend)!!! and so.....well this is it....enjoy the boring tagging of me:

1. Do you think you’re a freak : YEAH! and guess what? IM PROUD OF IT!

2. What will you do if somebody just past by and kiss you : i would.....i would....stare into space and then push that person while screaming then run away like a maniac while yelling!

3. What are you eating : ICE CREAM!!! (aww...man i need to diet)

4. Would you forgive the person who treated you so badly : well....depends.....maybe....ok fine

5. Currently listening to : Almost by bowling for soup and yeah thats the name of the band and after that im gonna listen to my favourite song , IM BRINGIN SEXYBACK, YEAH! (JK)

6. Do you love being weird : HELL YEAH! its fun and funny especially with frens!

7. Single or available : single....maybe....available.....maybe....

8. Wish you could have more siblings(?) : HELL NO! i got a brother and a sister ALREADY! WHO NEEDS MORE?!

9. What do you think of spammers : they are MEAN and they make people feel EMO! like i was just now for a particular reason....

10. Wish you could be skinnier(?) : YEAH!!! so much!!!! and i also wish i was prettier and smarter and....and.....well if i continue it would be a LONG LONG LONG list!

11. Look to your left what do you see : a wall....a beautiful statue of god and PLUSH TOY!! YAY!! *hugs plush toy!*

12. Hate your life(?) : OF COURSE! SOMEBODY TAKE ME AWAY!

13. What makes you hyper : dunno....its ofcourse not seeing my teacher walk into class

14. The funniest word that you ever heard : POTATOES!

15. Is this boring(?) : nope!

Ppl who got tagged : charmaine (i dont know if im suppose to tag the person who tagged me or not but still) , diorene (love ya buddy (a.a.f) , adrian (hope you enjoy doin it buddy!), alex (NO MORE CHOCOLATE!) and *lets see* oh yeah, jenny WEE (that means you, jonathan! haha) and ivan if he has a blog....i dunnowell thats all i guess! thanks for listening ecally its reading but wat the heck, BUH-BYE!

i scream alot accually

2009-07-03T07:34:00.000-07:00
ok this is boring but unfortunately im bored so who cares im gonna post this anyway. ok today when it was BI period i think i was talkin to chermaine and ivan bout somthing when suddently out of no where alex comes and slams his hand on the table then i think ivan got shocked or somthing but ivan too slammed somthing on the table (i think its his book) and that scared the life outta me! i screamed like i screamed at the ghost house that me and fatin went to last year at sunway lagoon...*shivers* huh...im remembered it just like it was yesterday...THATS BCOS I WAS SCARED LIKE HELL!!! ok this is what happened:
THE GHOST HOUSE AT SUNWAY LAGOON WITH ME AND FATIN AND THE GHOST (ofcourse)
okay anyway, we were at sunway lagoon (the day was almost over) and we were checking out the activity board and to tell the truth, i was lookin at the tea cup thing. and suddently fatin was like:fatin; Hey look theres a ghost house! cool! lets go there nex!and in my mind i was "HELL NO!" but instead of saying that i said,me: umm...i dont think we bought a ticket for that

fatin: aww.....alright nvm-lah

me: *phew*

my mum: you knoe if you want we could still get tickets for the ghost house. so, you girls up for it?

fatin: really?! cool! LETS DO IT! huh, chan?

me: ..........*sweat*

fatin: chan?

me: uhh.......okay

fatin: COOL!

my mum: ok! lets go to the counter and see the prices

fatin: YAY! now we can go to the ghost house that we always wanted to go together! THIS IS SOO FUN! THIS IS THE BESTEST DAY EVER!

me: uhh...yeah.....yay......*shivers even more*

then we reach the counter and rite nex to the counter was the ghost house and the door of the ghost house was a clown's mouth with blood. *shivers* HOW DID THEY KNOE I WAS AFAID OF CLOWNS?! then as we aproach the counter,

me; huh........im not sure bout this....

fatin: dont worry it will be so much fun!

the counter lady: its rm25.00 per person but you will be able to go in the ghost house for as many times as you want.

in my mind i was lik "why in the world would i go back THERE!" but what came out was just "huh...."

my mum: great! ill take 2 tickets please

me: you mean your not goin?!

my mum: no way! IM not GOIN in THERE!

me: WHAT?! *looks at fatin*

fatin: that means its just us huh? *smiles*

me: i wanna faint

then in the line, this american guy in charge,

american guy: you ready?

me: *bends down on the floor* i feel sick

american: normaly people get sick AFTER they go into the ghost house. your a special one huh?

fatin: *laughs*

me: *smile*

american guy: you wanna go in now or wait for a group?

me: GROUP!

american: whoa! ok ok!

fatin: *laughs louder*

then a chinese couple came and they waited for us (aww...how nice of them) i was like feelling really sick so i was like,

me: fatin, you go ahead ill go sit down for a while ill go wit you the 2nd time

fatin: WHAT?!

me: you just go ahead

fatin: WHAT?!

me: sorry im chickening out

fatin: WHAT?!

american guy: what what what?! just go ahead on over its al right if you get scared ill go fetch you out

me: umm.....*then the doors suddently opened and a loud thunder came out and then screams the this guy jumped out and that made me scream so i was feeling faint!

me: HELL NO! im sitting here

fatin: but...

the couple: dont worry. you can walk wit us

fatin: really?

me: go ahead

the couple: c'mon you can hold my hand

fatin: thanks

then in they go....
ps: the couple was one guy and one girl and the girl hugged the guys hand and fatin hugged the other hand! whoa! lucky guy! anyway, fatin came out laughing,

me: how was it?

fatin: GREAT! IT WAS GREAT!

me: thats good. sorry i couldnt come in with you

fatin: its okay! the couple was SO NICE! wanna try goin in now?

me: uhh...okay

fatin: great! *drags me over*

american guy: are you ready NOW?

me; yeah

american guy: GREAT! *opens door*

i heard ALOT of screams, lightning and evil laughs)

american guy: dont worry the ghost cant touch you. and as long as you dont touch them they wont touch you

me: uhh...*looks at the pitch dark room*

me: umm...i having second thoughs

fatin: DONT TALK SHIT! LETS GO! *drags me in*

me: WAIT WAIT!

then the door shuts. and the screams all come out again. the fatin told me just hold on to her and walk and so i did until...

me: *grabs fatin's hand and hugs it like it was my job to hug her*

fatin: LETS GO!

me: huh....then we went to think tunnel or somthing lik that and there were many people in cloaks and masks, not so scary rite?, WRONG! yeah sure people in cloaks and masks, LAME, sure but the thing is that ecally there was only one of them and that one was movin around the room WITHOUT LEGS! HE WAS FREAKIN FLOATING!! and surprising-ly he was fast,

fatin: look its the guy in the red cloak! ecally all of them are one!

me: umm...wasnt him over there? why is he suddently here?

fatin: dunno

me: what?! *shivers*

continue, then we went into this room and the guy asks us to look at the screen and watch the movie so i did...well okay fine i wasnt really consentrating on the movie and dont call me inattentive cos sometimes people get distracted when theres a FREAKIN GHOST BEHIND THE PERSON! and yeah i could feel his leg, then i was like,

me: fatin...theres a person.....

fatin: i know.....

me: huh.....*closes eyes and prays*

fatin: oh god....

then outta no where....

ghost: *whispers into my ear* hi.....

me: AHHHHHHHHH!!!!! WHAT THE HELLL!!!!!!

fatin: .......

*everybody looks at me* (blush)

then continue we went into this place wit pictures that move and stuff then into this room and the this guy who is dressed as a police man came and said "take care" then he banged the door 3 times and it opened and then they pushed us it and great guess what WE WERE ALONE!! NO GUIDE! then i relized the theme of this part is "prison escape" or somting. i dunno but somthing bout the people behind bars yelling at us and the guys in the electric chair saying " save yourselves" gave me a hint. then the lights were flashing so it was hard to see. it looked as if we were in a movie or somthing. so then i hugged fatin's hand even more (kinda like she was my boyfriend that i never wanted to leave her or something) then this maniac in the jail cell YELLED AT ME and i ecally jumped and screamed and totally hugged fatin! LOL! then eventually we got out. huh....thank god,

me: huh...

fatin: hahaha! that was funny!

me: sure....haha.....huh.....*sweat*

fatin: lets go to your mum

me: ok.

then we walk on over and,

me: hi ma.

my mum: haha! you look so pale

fatin: ofcourse! she screamed the whole time

me: *laughs*

my mum: so overall, how was it?

fatin: GREAT!

me: good. loads of fun (sh'yeah right i was dying out there! but i cant help it, it was funny)

my mum: wanna go again?

me: HELL NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~~~~~~~~~the end~~~~~~~~~~~

a very silly yet FUN trip

2009-07-03T07:28:00.000-07:00

hey there! okay, so today was normal...you knoe, wake up, brush up, eat, play wit bunnies, online, update blog. a normal sunday (without hw) day. so i was blogging...blogging...blogging...then suddently...BOOM BOOM BOOM!!!! *opens door*

me: WHAT?!

dad: WERE GOIN TO THE BEACH!!! *smiles*

me: . . .seriously?

dad: yeah. mummy wants to

me: . . .huh....lazy....

my sis: THE BEACH!!! YAY!!!!

me: . . .huh....(i guess that means i have to go....troublesome)

dad: *walks down edi*

so then i got ready, not b4

talkin to my mum 4 a bit. then i changed and my mum said "make sure u bring extra clothes" and im like "im not even goin to swim. i hate the beach" "just do it"

and so i did, after a little fight (nothin serious) then i went down and my bro just woke up from his sleep. so i said "go get ready. were goin to the beach" and hes all "im not goin. im staying home" and i was "WUT?! HOW COME HE GETS TO STAY?!" and in the end i still went.
so the journey begans. we brought ALOT of things even though its only gonna be for like a few hours. dont care-lah. anyway we toke like 1 hour to get "there" and when we reached the beach im like "FINALLY!" my dad told me "NAH! this isnt the beach" and im like "WHAT?!" so then we hopped back into the car and drove off to ANOTHER beach. then when we reached there,

"huh....the air smells like sea"

"IT SMELLS LIKE SHIT! POLLUTED!! NEXT"

"WHAT?!"

then to the third beach

"*to tired to say anything*"

"hmmm......"

"its nice (my mum)"

"it isnt what it used to be"

"....."

"the tide is too low"

"NEXT"

then in the end we went around and AROUND AND AROUND until it tok us like 2 hours to find the perfect beach and in the end we played around for only like 30 minutes or more....SO MUCH FOR SO LITTLE?!

well the beach was NICE! the air was great! me and my sis tok LOADS of pictures! LOL! and we bought ICE CREAM!!! YUM! but it was against my diet! i need to exercise more *sob* anyway my sis and i also wrote silly words in the sand! my sis wrote her blog and other stuff and i wrote a cute "ice cream", a heart (i wont tel whos name was in it) and a BIG FAT CUTE "I WAS HERE" LOL! but take my advice, if ur on the beach i was on...there will be monkeys almost EVERYWHERE NEAR THE BEACH and they will be pee-ing on ur stuff (lucky my family didnt get any monkey pee but i saw one monkey pee-ing on a car...poor car) and also DONT LOOK DOWN. cos at the beach i was at there were cute little baby CRABS coming out from the sand and they were kinda making my hair stand especially when ALL 50 OF THEM WALK TOGETHER! EWW!!! i was tryin my best not to step on them. they were kinda gross when they moved but I CANT KILL AN INNOCENT CREATURE! anyway i still had a good time even though i reached home at around 11.00 or so... but overall....

i loved it...

school

2009-07-03T07:18:00.001-07:00

does this look familiar??? (haha looks like me and my friends when teacher's teaching)

another farmiliar pic!
who do you think will win??? (naruto:SMELL THE FOOT, SASUKE!!)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~in the end even naruto characters hate school~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

5 facts of an emo person

2009-07-03T07:16:00.000-07:00
okay today ONCE again i was feeling bored so i decided ill do 5 facts about me for fun since you know....who would want to see my blog or know 5 facts abou me anyway....moving on...HERE IT IS!!!!!;

fact number 1!!!!
i like animals ALOT but i am really really scared of reptials!!!! especially snakes and crocodiles!!!! they scare the living wits outta me!!!

fact number 2!!!!
i love plush teddies!!!! their soo super cute!! but i am really really really really x 100 really scared of dolls!!!! they are super premo scary!!! especially barbie dolls THAT ALWAYS SMILE!!!

fact number 3!!!!
i am dreadfully afraid of glitter! bad past!!! its too long to explain but lets just say i was tryin to get glitter outta my hair for a week! YUCK!

fact number 4!!!!
i love to draw but i hate to colour!!! yeah thats rite i hate colouring! i hate it!! i had another very very bad past about colouring!!! *sob*

fact number 5!!!!
okay this is the worst fact of all! im afraid of something NOBODY IS AFRAID OF! i am like super afraid of windows!!! and yeah you can laugh, i know i know "windows?! okaaaay...your weird" i get that alot! but think about it. in horror movies dont you always see that shadow in the window? *looks behind at window* umm...i think im goin continue this down stairs with the comfort of my parents!!! *RUNS*

okay thats all i have time for and after all there are only 5 facts in a 5 fact thingy so...catcha later! and please feel free to sent me 5 facts about you too at (sookchengc@yahoo.com or channylikesrabbits@hotmail.com ) ! i wanna know!

cupcake on the beach!

2009-07-03T07:14:00.002-07:00

one day,
two muffins go into the oven,
the baker turns up the heat,
then the first muffin begans to speak,
the first muffin says,
"man, its hot in here!"
the second muffin says,
"HOLY CRAP, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

if you just dont understand...

2009-07-03T07:14:00.001-07:00

If you don’t understand what im about;
if you don’t understand who I am;
if you don’t understand why I’m the way I am….
Wrap your mind around this.
If you don’t understand why I dance,
you need to watch me dance again.
Look closer.
Look at my eyes.
Can you see right through me?
Like im made of glass?
You see my heart, you see my veins?
You hear that music?
That’s me your hearing.
The rhythm my blood, and the beat my heart.
Without this I can never be.
If you don’t understand run it back again.
If you don’t understand why I laugh,
you need to listen to me again.
Listen closer.
Listen to my voice.
can you see right through me?
Like im made of sky?
My lungs my brain,
Filled with air and thoughts of sadness.
Look at the sky,
you’ll find me there.
Look in the ocean,
you’ll find me there.
Look in the center of the earth,
you’ll find me there too.
I laugh at myself,
I laugh at everything around me.
My imagination taking me everywhere,
but nowhere.
If you don’t understand run it back again.
If you don’t understand why im writing this...
Run it back again.

emo blogger..

2009-07-03T07:02:00.000-07:00

hello there.

i think you know me. cos then why would you be goin to my blog?... whatever-lah. anyway im bored and a little ticked off. i created this new blog cos my old blog has gone nuts. i cant log into it anymore. i guess its bcos i havent been using it for a LOOOOONG time and i guess thats why. now i have to waste my time to create a new one and im too ass-lazy too. anyway, i shall be using this new blog from now on. so....enjoy?